How I’m doing now (Friday, April 8^th)

I’m doing a lot better. It has been six weeks since my surgery and a lot has changed. Two weeks ago, my tight rubber bands were replaced with loose ones so I can open my mouth and exercise my jaw to regain the movement of its muscles. As of a week ago, I have been able to eat soft foods!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love food!!! No more Ensure three meals a day!! I can eat with a spoon and I can swallow pills. NO MORE SYRINGES!!!!!!!!!!! Its not easy to eat though because my teeth don’t fit together well and they are still very sensitive to touch (such as having food on them). Remember, I slammed my mouth into a metal railing at high speed.

One of the most frustrating things since I have gotten my tight rubber bands off is that only half of my teeth touch each other, top and bottom. My front teeth do not touch, and none of the teeth on the right side of my mouth touch, with the exception of the very back set of teeth. Otherwise, my teeth only touch on the left side of my mouth. It will require a lot of dental work to fix. The purpose of the surgery, wires, and tight rubber bands were essentially to move my jaw to its proper place and teach it to stay there, but it is not perfect. It may be a while before I am able to chew regularly again and expand my diet due to the sensitivity of my teeth and how off my bite is.

On Wednesday, I went to church for Adoration and felt like I connected to God more than I previously have since my injury. Since my injury I felt like I couldn’t reach God, but then I came to an understanding that God wants to come here to be with me. I don’t have to do anything special to reach God because He will come to me.

I have been without significant pain in my jaw for about a week, until yesterday. Yesterday, they removed the loose rubber bands and I do not have anything holding my teeth in place, besides the archbars (metals bars lining the top of bottom of my gums with hooks to provide anchors for the wires and rubbers bands). I didn’t want that to happen; without the rubber bands holding my jaws in place, when I chew and at other times, my jaw jerks laterally and I have a striking pain on the right of my jaw, up by my ear, that lasts for only an instant. It is very frustrating and annoying and happened to me so many times that I chose to stop eating dinner last night. I also had the ear pain last night for the first time in over a week, which was very annoying. In two more weeks, I will see the doctors again and set a surgery date to remove my archbars.

That is my journey of suffering, so far. As my healing continues, the suffering is lessened, but it is still not easy physically and mentally and may be a while until I am back to normal. Prayers are appreciated. If you are dealing with a serious injury, I am still dealing with mine and do not feel like I have advice I can give you on how to get through it. The best thing I can share with you is what Canon shared with me. Its okay to not be okay.

God bless you.